Maternity shopping 101.
I was talking to my girlfriend the other day and reminiscing on our maternity shopping experiences.
I’ll never forget the afternoon I went out to get my dress for my baby shower. Have I mentioned ENOUGH times to everyone that I was massive when I was pregnant the first go round? Well, my Mama brought me shopping; I had been eyeing this cute little dress for a while. I remember putting it on, thinking I looked awesome, walking out of the dressing room, looking at myself in the mirror, having my Mom tell me I looked beautiful and then walking back into the change room with tears trickling down my face. I tried to stop them, I was all “SHERIDAN, you’re pregnant! You’re glowing! You have a beautiful baby girl growing inside of you, this is so worth it!” But it just didn’t matter – the truth of the matter was that I felt like a whale and that day just wasn’t my day. Thankfully, not everyday was that day, but pregnancy hormones are a b*tch and because we can’t all look like the models who shove a fake bump in their bellies for the photoshoot, I have learned THIS time around, how to shop easily and tear free.
TIPS FOR NOT CRYING UGLY TEARS WHEN BUYING MATERNITY CLOTHES:
Buy your clothes earlier rather than later, more specifically: when you have a cute little bump and you think you’re adorable.
DO NOT buy pants without belt loops on the side. I REPEAT, do NOT purchase pants that do not have extendable buttons on the side for you to adjust as you get bigger. Yep, they may look good while you try them on, but trust me, by the end of the day they are down past your bum and somehow you look like you have a penis. – THIS above else is the most important tip I can give you. I learnt the hard way, penis looking pants for days.
Buy the basics, you won’t regret it. In my personal experience you will need: a great pair of jeans, a pair of leggings, a couple tank tops, a few classic t-shirts and some phenomenal XL sweatpants.
Quality over quantity. When you’re rocking a baby belly and you’re not so focused on cute crop tops from Forever 21 that cost 5 dollars, you will need to bring out the big bucks. Rather than buying 3 pairs of mediocre pants for 40 dollars each, buy one pair that are 100 dollars and you will wear them everyday.
Bras are stupid. My least favourite thing in the world are bras. They drive me nuts, and now that I’m not trying to impress anyone with my overly perky boobs (where did those things go?) I choose comfort over everything else in life. The reality is, when you’re pregnant, your boobs are going to hurt. You’re going to want to punch your man in the face if he dare tries to touch those things attached to your chest. Go out and buy some bras that are weightless and comfortable. You UNFORTUNATELY have to wear a bra when you’re out and about, so it’s important you wear something that you don’t have to complain about.
Do not go shopping with a friend who isn’t pregnant. This is really just a given. Do I really want to go into H&M and try on sweaters and jeans from the maternity section while you’re beside me trying on the same damn thing 17 sizes smaller? Then we show each other and I’m all – CAN YOU SEE MY BACK ROLLS OR? And I really mean it, can you see them or not. And then they’re all – can you see mine? GIRL WHERE. You do not know back rolls until you’re pregnant so BYE.
Bring snacks. A hangry pregnant women is a nightmare. However, a happily fed pregnant women with constant snacks in their pockets is a different story. Be the happy pregnant woman.
Buy baggy clothes so you can wear them later with your post belly bump, because yes, your belly will be as floppy as anything. I know, Instagram is a real asshole (excuse the extra potty mouth lately, pregnancy brings it out of me) and will show off the girls who have a perfect 8 pack three weeks postpartum. That’s a big LOL for me. They are an anomaly. As far as I’m concerned, you’ll still be rocking extra large pads and maternity pants for a hot minute. Buy yourself some baggy tank tops, not just the tight ones that show off your belly. They’ll come in handy after your cute little nugget is in the real world and you have the saggy-ness to prove it.
Online shopping is the bees knees. What is better than buying things without having to move a muscle? Not a whole lot. AND THIS JUST IN: Apparently The Gap has decided to take out their maternity section from stores and it is now only available through shopping online. This alone is a pretty good reason to consider checking things out on your screen.
ONLY go shopping on the days where you feel like a solid 10. I know you know the days I am talking about. Don’t just run out and try to grab some new things, I repeat, we are not as we once were, we are now PREGNANT and everything is different. It’s not as simple as it once was. Wait until you’re really feeling yourself before you venture out into the big bad shopping world.
And PS, a couple of my favourite maternity stores are: Old Navy, H&M, Thyme Maternity, Better Than Her Boutique, Hazlenut & Rose and The Gap. What else do you wonderful Mamas know of? Send me an e-mail! Hook a sista up. I’m going to catch some Z’s now. I just ate two peanut butter cookies and there are crumbs everywhere. #NOREGRETS.
xx,
Sheridan
